Frankly Speaking’s New Year’s Honours List

Happy New Year folks. Hope all enjoyed the festive season. As tradition dictates, The Queen of United Kingdom annually gives out honours to those of the British public. I cannot see why we at Frankly Speaking cannot follow suit and do a football equivalent. So here's to those who's achievements we recognise in the football world for 2011.      

Player of 2011 – Robin van Persie

35 goals in the year and pretty much carry an ailing side on his back. Enough said.

The Zlatan Ibrahimović Temperimental Player of 2011 – Carlos Tevez

Desperate to leave Manchester and is currently AWOL from his City side. Could there have been anybody else to pick up this gong.

Performance Of The Year – Barcelona beating Manchester United

All possible choices strangely had Manchester United featured. But never before has one team psychologically destroyed another elite team whilst being stuck in third gear, and on arguably football’s biggest stage. Exceptional performance from Barcelona to the Red Devils. The result made Fergie try and revamp the club’s playing style going forward to emulate the Catalonians. 

Bargin Buy – Demba Ba

Two things of note here, how much is Tony Pulis regretting not signing him for Stoke? Secondly, I will be amazed if he is still at Newcastle come the start of next season.

Surving Relegation By The Skin Of Their Teeth Award – Roberto Martínez and Wigan

They always look dead and buried all season long, and with six weeks left they wake up and manage to survive. Incredible!

Repetitive Interview Award – Harry Redknapp

Can Harry ever say anything apart from, "Well we’ll give it a go", in his interviews?

Can Start A Fight In An Empty Bar Award – Mario Balotelli

Simply, the man is box-office.

Return Of The King Moment – Kenny Dalglish

Dusted off the old manger’s manual and galvanised the club’s lowly fortunes within a year.

 

Most Improved Appearance Award – Wayne Rooney

New hairdo, money well spent I guess.

Surprised He Is Still At The Club – Jack Rodwell and Cheick Tioté

Everton have played a great game in keeping hold of a talented youngster like Rodwell. After an impressive first season and being compared to Michael Essien in his pomp, with every game for Newcastle so far this season Tioté is enhancing his reputation amongst the top teams.

Golden Oldie Award – Brad Friedel

A man of 40 years of age should not be diving around and keeping goal like Friedel has been during the year. Key signing for Tottenham, and some nifty wheeling and dealing from Harry "Well we'll give it a go" Redknapp. Oh yes I forgot, he does not wheel or deal. You are what you are Harry, no use trying to prove otherwise.

Biggest Fall From Grace – Tim Cahill

Seriously when was the last time Cahill scored a goal? What happened to his kangaroo Aussie leap and scoring loads of headed goals?

The Carles Puyol Look-alike Top Defender Award – Fabricio Coloccini

The Argentine has been in inspired form for Newcastle under the Alan Pardew regime.

The Carles Puyol Look-alike "I cannot defend" Award – David Luiz

Great going forward, can give the team much needed drive, but has no interest in defending. The troubled John Terry has got his hands full working in unison with his defensive partner.

Young Player Of 2011 – Javier ‘Chicharito’ Hernández

Took to English and European football like a duck does to water, Dimitar Berbatov days could well be numbered.

Unsung Hero Award - Dickson Etuhu

In the minefield of midfield, there are better players around and most certainly better players who play in his position. However on the field for Fulham, Etuhu is like the Ronseal wood stain slogan, "Does exactly what it says on the tin".

Top Professional/Kiss and Tell/Scumbag Award – Ryan Giggs

Never before has on individual mastered all three unrelated forms so efficiently. At the time of his activities, I bet he did not think his reported actions would be discussed in British Parliament and the front pages eh.

Loudest Moaners To Not Hearing A Peep Of Complaints – Arsenal Fans

"In Wenger we rust", was the motto at the start of the season with some Arsenal fans. But with the worst bunch of players he has had at his disposal, Professor Wenger has masterminded his team into top four contention. Who dares challenge Wenger? Disgruntled Arsenal fans have all gone very quiet of late.

Comeback Of The Year - Thierry Henry

To those that doubt the merits of his return at Arsenal, an average Henry is still a damn good player ahead of many of opponents

The Andriy Shevchenko (Reverts To Stéphane Guivarc'h During International Tournaments) Award – Fernando Torres

El Nino should really be called El no goals (apart from three) seems to find locating a needle in a haystack a far easier job than trapping the ball and putting it into the onion bag.

The "I can’t believe they brought him for that money!!!" Award – Jordan Henderson

When I see this player I cannot help but think about a table. Why you may ask? Well because Henderson brings nothing to it.